Is rape as we know it a social construct?
If so, what does that mean about our legal and social response to it?
Does that make feminism's "rape culture" theory a social construct?
How does that affect the validity of the theory?
Showing posts with label social construct. Show all posts
Showing posts with label social construct. Show all posts
In Response to my Newest Fan
To the male feminist who copied the text of my consent post in its entirety, then re-posted it in your own blog intertwined with straw man arguments and denial:
First: Accepting implied consent as consent can get a guy charged with rape. It has gotten and can get a guy kicked out of post-secondary school through the college or university's disciplinary system. This can happen and has happened even when consent is implied by active participation. This can happen and has happened even when the female initiates sexual contact. This can happen and has happened even when there are witness to the event who explain that. Giving your own definition of what constitutes consent is interesting, but it does not change how feminist advocacy has shaped the legal definitions which determine the environment faced by sexually active men. No matter how you feel about consent, the fact is that men as a group and individually are subject to the possibility of being accused on the basis of a woman's whim. Failure to account for that reality is a risk, regardless of your feeling or belief.
Second: What we are worried about here is not, as you claim, limited to consent in terms of a relationship. We are worried about the movement in modern western society to convince women that any time sex is later regretted, for any reason, even if there was consent at the time of the activity, the act should be considered rape of the woman by the man. MRAs do not consider consent to be a trap. The movement is in overall agreement that
Feminists attempt to move the target regarding what constitutes consent, arguing for the right to treat consensual sex as rape if the female partner chooses to withdraw consent at a later time. The movement has successfully convinced some judges to treat post-sex-act withdrawal of consent as legally binding.
The movement has successfully advocated adoption by universities of rule sets under which consent implied by active and willful participation does not negate allegation of rape because consent was not spoken. Discussion on this often includes selective quoting of more sensible policies, as when debaters quote from Vasser's definition of consent from the school's Sexual Assault Violence Prevention plan in order to advocate treating it as "A process, which must be asked for every step of the way; if you want to move to the next level of sexual intimacy" (in other words, asking permission before each new action, such as kissing, each area touched, and so on) while ignoring the admonitions toward women (contained in the same policy statement) to communicate, "Say 'no.' Say 'I want to stop.'" and even to take matters into their own hands if communication is ignored, "In a situation where the other person isn’t listening to you and you feel unsafe, you could pretend you are going to vomit. (It’s amazing how quickly someone moves away from you if they think you are going to be sick)." Highlighting the suggestion of obsessive questioning as a means of ensuring consent while ignoring the empowering advice below it shows a determination in the debater to embrace willful helplessness. Too often, the same feminist advocacy which demands that women be treated as being as tough, strong, and capable as men in every other situation turns around and demands that women be treated as weak, helpless, and incapable of standing up for themselves in iffy, rather than overtly forceful, sexual encounters.
The movement has successfully convinced many women that consent withdrawn after the woman has participated in sex can change the man's status from participant to rapist. When the logic of this is questioned, it is never countered on its own merits. Instead, many feminist advocates move the goalposts, choosing instead to discuss withdrawal of consent during the act, and avoiding discussion of withdrawal of consent after the act and how that can criminalize the male partner's part in consensual sex. Some instead argue that consent is not valid unless it's enthusiastic consent. In other words, heterosexual sex involving a woman who is not naturally demonstrative? Rape. Heterosexual sex involving a woman who is interested but too tired to physically show enthusiasm? Rape. Heterosexual sex involving a woman who isn't naturally assertive in the pursuit of her desires? Rape.
It is one thing to argue that sexual activity should stop when one partner communicates discomfort or dislike, or cessation of desire or interest. That is reasonable - it's rape if someone says "stop" (or in the context of alternative sex acts, utters the "safe word,") and the other partner refuses and forces the issue. It's a whole other ballgame to argue that a partner is guilty of rape because the other partner has at a later date changed her mind. It is not reasonable to expect that an individual would know consent is withdrawn, without verbal or at least easily discernible nonverbal communication of discomfort, dislike, or cessation of desire or interest (such as pushing him away, turning away, dramatic, obvious reduction in physical participation from enthusiastic to nil.) Assuming the male has such knowledge in the absence of evidence is essentially a requirement that he be psychic.
Third: Feminism does not have to be a single standpoint to be held responsible for the practical application of the advocacy discussed. I'd explain to you why, but there's another woman who has all ready given the best possible explanation, and I recommend listening to her statement on the topic. If you don't take measures to rein in the advocacy which is actively chipping away at the due process rights of men, actively shaping post-secondary educational facilities' policy on handling allegations of rape in a way that criminalizes simply being male and accused, actively teaching young women to consider themselves victimized by a man whenever the decision to have sex leads to consequences they don't like, you have no business arguing that feminism is not a single standpoint. That advocacy is the advocacy which is getting results. If you choose to wear the label under which that advocacy is active, you choose to be associated with their assertions, their beliefs, their attitudes, and their reputation. If you don't like that, then don't quietly stand by while they fight for ideals you claim not to support. Speak up, condemn the behavior, and shape your movement. If you refuse to do that, then your attempt to dissociate yourself from the mainstream, most active, most applied brand of feminism is a bald-faced lie.
Moving on: Your mischaracterization of the paragraph on female sexual liberation and slut shaming shows a lack of reading comprehension. The paragraph does not condemn the sexual liberation of women. It merely describes the activity of the movement... and there is a reason why "allegedly" precedes "male practice" in the introduction of that label. Ranting as if you didn't catch that is either disingenuous, or a sign of inability to keep up.
Your paragraph about cheating is a straw man. The last sentence states that applying the label "slut shaming" to the act of treating a female cheating on a male partner as a mistreatment of the male - in other words, a hurtful and harmful act committed against him by her - is an abuse of the label. Your response? "If a woman cheats, it hurts you, but it is no excuse to treat her as a slut." This would be a straw-man argument, as the sentence does not excuse use of the term slut, but condemns applying the label slut-shaming when a male partner treats a betrayal as the betrayal that it is.
For the record, partner cheating is not treated equally between the sexes. Male cheating on female partners is considered abuse, condemned as the behavior of a selfish, uncaring and dishonest individual. Male cheating is blamed on the cheater, and on occasion, the other woman, but rarely on conflict with the female partner - that would be blaming the victim. The jilted woman has social and legal support behind her in expressing feelings of hurt, betrayal, abandonment, and being unwanted... and in seeking some measure of reprisal, even to the point of violent behavior. The lines drawn are clear. When a male cheats on a female, it's an abuse perpetrated against her. There is no outrage at how she chooses to treat him because of the incident. There is only support for the woman's effort to assuage her own feelings by whatever actions she chooses, up to and sometimes including assault. In fact, when a woman is seen abusing a man in public, the assumption that he deserved it because he cheated is sometimes even seen by the public, especially by other women, as an excuse for the violence. Notice the "You go girl" reaction. Notice in the narration of the linked video, it's explained that hundreds of people walk by. Notice women stating that the man probably deserved the abuse because (they assumed) he was cheating. Notice how only a small minority took any action to help the victim.
Conversely, when a female cheats, the perception often is that the cheater is the victim. It is unacceptable to assert that her behavior indicates selfishness, lack of caring, or dishonesty. Instead, the blame goes to the other man, who must have seduced her, or to her male partner, who must be abusive or neglectful of her needs. When she cheats with a woman, the blame goes to society, who kept her from figuring herself out (making up her mind about her sexuality) until too late to spare the man the experience. It's not treated as a betrayal, but a mistake which should be forgiven. When her male partner attempts to hold her responsible for her actions, that's considered treating her as if she's his property. If she's using the seduction excuse, then by claiming betrayal, he's blaming her for being tricked, as if she had no agency to consent or to withhold consent from the other man. If she's using mistreatment as an excuse, then by showing his hurt, he's blaming her for something he made her do, as if he walked her to the other man's bed and put her in it. If she's using sexual confusion as an excuse, then by feeling abandoned, he's blaming her for society's forced repression of her sexuality.
Your last sentence in discussing that paragraph is one of the defining characteristics of MRA complaints with feminism: If you treat an entire gender as jerks then you will always always be disappointed. That is what feminism does - treat an entire gender as jerks, only bigger. The feminist movement treats an entire gender as criminals waiting to happen, who must be ordered to not commit crimes, or expected to commit them.
Following that, thanks for addressing me as a man. (Have you ever considered that the problem with your dating strategy is you keep thinking that sex is something to be earned?) That's probably the most telling thing you did in your entire post. By not even bothering to read my sidebar, "Whose Blog Is This" to find out who you are dealing with, you let yourself fall into the oh-so-common feminist fallacy of assuming that the only people concerned with men's rights are men. In doing so, you have disclosed your sexist outlook.
Further, your whole argument relies upon treating your personal philosophy as being the reality in which dating takes place. It's not. It's not men who treat sex with women as a privilege, but sex with men as a given. It's women. It's even taught to daughters by their mothers and grandmothers, with inane adages like "why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free," meaning "don't be promiscuous, or no man will marry you."
Your belief in male consent agency is great, but it's not backed up by legal handling. The assumption that consent and body autonomy are reserved for women is an attitude which permeates modern western society, leading to such myths as the idea that men can't be raped, or if he is, he's weak or gay. Many western laws still define rape as something men do, and women suffer. When a man's sexual boundaries are violated, if there is prosecution, lesser terms like "sexual assault" and "sexual imposition" are applied. Try using "Woman convicted of forcible rape" as a search term. It doesn't call up any stories on the topic. Instead, it brings up stories on convicted men, discussions on male rapists of women, and a few hypothetical questions with hypothetical answers. Take out "woman" and you'll get even more stories about male rapists. Is this because no woman has ever forced herself on a man?
No.
Recent statistics in the U.S., from which I hail, show that women commit rape (forcing men to penetrate) as often as men (forced penetration.) However, when women do it, it's not legally considered rape - merely an "other sexual offense." When a man forces sex on a woman, it gets the most serious criminal labeling. When a woman forces sex on a man, it gets downplayed as a more minor offense. Does that show equal treatment and value of consent?
Your assessment of the paragraph beginning "In the dating arena" is another strawman, taking the discussion out of the sex act and into minor interactions, ignoring the context in which the statement is made. Again, I see two possibilities. Either your reading comprehension is low, or you're once again attempting to move the goalposts because you can't debate the topic. The claim that emotional response to sexual advances keeps women from saying no, made in the context of date-rape allegations and affirmative consent discussions, amounts to exactly what it says in that paragraph. This is reinforced by the idea that consent may be withdrawn at any time. If consent is withdrawn, but the change is not communicated, the man hasn't changed his intent. He is not responsible for the woman changing her mind. However, college disciplinary boards and criminal courts do hold men responsible for that change. Once again, your personal philosophy on how dating should be does not define how things are.
The same is true of your assessment of the one after, beginning "Complicating this environment." Your claim that no one is treating women as helpless is not backed up by criminal courts, nor is it backed up by feminist advocacy. Your next sentence attempts again to move the goalposts from discussion of incidents involving women who withhold communication and then accuse rape, to women who have been raped after saying no. The issue isn't that the circumstance described never happens. The issue is that you cannot address it without admitting that sometimes, rape allegations the woman believes to be true are false, and sometimes, a sexual encounter that a woman regrets experiencing is her own fault for choosing to not assert herself.
Following that, you add bigotry to your post, baselessly accusing MRAs as a group of having a love of "rapey behavior," which you fail to define. You've completely dropped all semblance of analysis and dropped into the realm of inarticulate denial and unmerited attacks.
Following that paragraph, you reply to the one beginning "This is taken to the extreme in the choice" with another attempt at moving the goalposts because you cannot debate the concept presented to you. With that, you level yet another straw man argument, attempting to debate an unmade statement of justification for sex with someone who is incapacitated. As previously stated, that is not a Men's Rights position.
Your answer to the next paragraph about the Gatekeeper to Consent argument is covered in my previous responses. The only thing I would add is that your reply is wandering and disconnected, and your dismissal is not a valid debate tactic.
Your response to the paragraph beginning "The answer is in how this combination may support the use of abuse" negates itself. I live in the western world - in the United States, where men are not considered able to be rape victims. Men do not have equal agency of consent here. Neither do they in Canada, or most of Europe. You can only believe otherwise if you ignore the entire first world's last few decades of legislative and legal history.
Your final paragraph is yet another straw man, choosing to argue against something much simpler and more benign than the topic discussed in the paragraph above it, the use of false allegations by women as a weapon. Attempting to retrain the reader's eye to the male rape discussion at that point is a sad stab at misdirection, considering it isn't even mentioned in the paragraph under which it is posted. You would do better to attempt to address the topic you brought up by placing that paragraph there.Your further choice to address the reply to MRAs as a group instead of the blogger at hand, leveling another ad-hominem attack on the movement instead of offering an actual point shows that your opinion is seated more in bias than knowledge.
Then again, maybe you would not. Your ability to stay on topic and handle tough questions with solid, well thought-out answers is seriously lacking. As you are a student, and as you write more like a person influenced than a person exercising reason, I suspect that you are still young, and have not had the chance to experience the level of discrimination and harassment some individuals in the movement you so hate have experienced. Perhaps after you have lived a little time outside the shelter of academia, you'll gain a better understanding of how things are in the real world. Until then, enjoy your delusions of practical equality while they last.
First: Accepting implied consent as consent can get a guy charged with rape. It has gotten and can get a guy kicked out of post-secondary school through the college or university's disciplinary system. This can happen and has happened even when consent is implied by active participation. This can happen and has happened even when the female initiates sexual contact. This can happen and has happened even when there are witness to the event who explain that. Giving your own definition of what constitutes consent is interesting, but it does not change how feminist advocacy has shaped the legal definitions which determine the environment faced by sexually active men. No matter how you feel about consent, the fact is that men as a group and individually are subject to the possibility of being accused on the basis of a woman's whim. Failure to account for that reality is a risk, regardless of your feeling or belief.
Second: What we are worried about here is not, as you claim, limited to consent in terms of a relationship. We are worried about the movement in modern western society to convince women that any time sex is later regretted, for any reason, even if there was consent at the time of the activity, the act should be considered rape of the woman by the man. MRAs do not consider consent to be a trap. The movement is in overall agreement that
- No means no
- Unconscious means no
- Incapacitated to inability to communicate or respond means no
- Underage means no
Feminists attempt to move the target regarding what constitutes consent, arguing for the right to treat consensual sex as rape if the female partner chooses to withdraw consent at a later time. The movement has successfully convinced some judges to treat post-sex-act withdrawal of consent as legally binding.
The movement has successfully advocated adoption by universities of rule sets under which consent implied by active and willful participation does not negate allegation of rape because consent was not spoken. Discussion on this often includes selective quoting of more sensible policies, as when debaters quote from Vasser's definition of consent from the school's Sexual Assault Violence Prevention plan in order to advocate treating it as "A process, which must be asked for every step of the way; if you want to move to the next level of sexual intimacy" (in other words, asking permission before each new action, such as kissing, each area touched, and so on) while ignoring the admonitions toward women (contained in the same policy statement) to communicate, "Say 'no.' Say 'I want to stop.'" and even to take matters into their own hands if communication is ignored, "In a situation where the other person isn’t listening to you and you feel unsafe, you could pretend you are going to vomit. (It’s amazing how quickly someone moves away from you if they think you are going to be sick)." Highlighting the suggestion of obsessive questioning as a means of ensuring consent while ignoring the empowering advice below it shows a determination in the debater to embrace willful helplessness. Too often, the same feminist advocacy which demands that women be treated as being as tough, strong, and capable as men in every other situation turns around and demands that women be treated as weak, helpless, and incapable of standing up for themselves in iffy, rather than overtly forceful, sexual encounters.
The movement has successfully convinced many women that consent withdrawn after the woman has participated in sex can change the man's status from participant to rapist. When the logic of this is questioned, it is never countered on its own merits. Instead, many feminist advocates move the goalposts, choosing instead to discuss withdrawal of consent during the act, and avoiding discussion of withdrawal of consent after the act and how that can criminalize the male partner's part in consensual sex. Some instead argue that consent is not valid unless it's enthusiastic consent. In other words, heterosexual sex involving a woman who is not naturally demonstrative? Rape. Heterosexual sex involving a woman who is interested but too tired to physically show enthusiasm? Rape. Heterosexual sex involving a woman who isn't naturally assertive in the pursuit of her desires? Rape.
It is one thing to argue that sexual activity should stop when one partner communicates discomfort or dislike, or cessation of desire or interest. That is reasonable - it's rape if someone says "stop" (or in the context of alternative sex acts, utters the "safe word,") and the other partner refuses and forces the issue. It's a whole other ballgame to argue that a partner is guilty of rape because the other partner has at a later date changed her mind. It is not reasonable to expect that an individual would know consent is withdrawn, without verbal or at least easily discernible nonverbal communication of discomfort, dislike, or cessation of desire or interest (such as pushing him away, turning away, dramatic, obvious reduction in physical participation from enthusiastic to nil.) Assuming the male has such knowledge in the absence of evidence is essentially a requirement that he be psychic.
Third: Feminism does not have to be a single standpoint to be held responsible for the practical application of the advocacy discussed. I'd explain to you why, but there's another woman who has all ready given the best possible explanation, and I recommend listening to her statement on the topic. If you don't take measures to rein in the advocacy which is actively chipping away at the due process rights of men, actively shaping post-secondary educational facilities' policy on handling allegations of rape in a way that criminalizes simply being male and accused, actively teaching young women to consider themselves victimized by a man whenever the decision to have sex leads to consequences they don't like, you have no business arguing that feminism is not a single standpoint. That advocacy is the advocacy which is getting results. If you choose to wear the label under which that advocacy is active, you choose to be associated with their assertions, their beliefs, their attitudes, and their reputation. If you don't like that, then don't quietly stand by while they fight for ideals you claim not to support. Speak up, condemn the behavior, and shape your movement. If you refuse to do that, then your attempt to dissociate yourself from the mainstream, most active, most applied brand of feminism is a bald-faced lie.
Moving on: Your mischaracterization of the paragraph on female sexual liberation and slut shaming shows a lack of reading comprehension. The paragraph does not condemn the sexual liberation of women. It merely describes the activity of the movement... and there is a reason why "allegedly" precedes "male practice" in the introduction of that label. Ranting as if you didn't catch that is either disingenuous, or a sign of inability to keep up.
Your paragraph about cheating is a straw man. The last sentence states that applying the label "slut shaming" to the act of treating a female cheating on a male partner as a mistreatment of the male - in other words, a hurtful and harmful act committed against him by her - is an abuse of the label. Your response? "If a woman cheats, it hurts you, but it is no excuse to treat her as a slut." This would be a straw-man argument, as the sentence does not excuse use of the term slut, but condemns applying the label slut-shaming when a male partner treats a betrayal as the betrayal that it is.
For the record, partner cheating is not treated equally between the sexes. Male cheating on female partners is considered abuse, condemned as the behavior of a selfish, uncaring and dishonest individual. Male cheating is blamed on the cheater, and on occasion, the other woman, but rarely on conflict with the female partner - that would be blaming the victim. The jilted woman has social and legal support behind her in expressing feelings of hurt, betrayal, abandonment, and being unwanted... and in seeking some measure of reprisal, even to the point of violent behavior. The lines drawn are clear. When a male cheats on a female, it's an abuse perpetrated against her. There is no outrage at how she chooses to treat him because of the incident. There is only support for the woman's effort to assuage her own feelings by whatever actions she chooses, up to and sometimes including assault. In fact, when a woman is seen abusing a man in public, the assumption that he deserved it because he cheated is sometimes even seen by the public, especially by other women, as an excuse for the violence. Notice the "You go girl" reaction. Notice in the narration of the linked video, it's explained that hundreds of people walk by. Notice women stating that the man probably deserved the abuse because (they assumed) he was cheating. Notice how only a small minority took any action to help the victim.
Conversely, when a female cheats, the perception often is that the cheater is the victim. It is unacceptable to assert that her behavior indicates selfishness, lack of caring, or dishonesty. Instead, the blame goes to the other man, who must have seduced her, or to her male partner, who must be abusive or neglectful of her needs. When she cheats with a woman, the blame goes to society, who kept her from figuring herself out (making up her mind about her sexuality) until too late to spare the man the experience. It's not treated as a betrayal, but a mistake which should be forgiven. When her male partner attempts to hold her responsible for her actions, that's considered treating her as if she's his property. If she's using the seduction excuse, then by claiming betrayal, he's blaming her for being tricked, as if she had no agency to consent or to withhold consent from the other man. If she's using mistreatment as an excuse, then by showing his hurt, he's blaming her for something he made her do, as if he walked her to the other man's bed and put her in it. If she's using sexual confusion as an excuse, then by feeling abandoned, he's blaming her for society's forced repression of her sexuality.
Your last sentence in discussing that paragraph is one of the defining characteristics of MRA complaints with feminism: If you treat an entire gender as jerks then you will always always be disappointed. That is what feminism does - treat an entire gender as jerks, only bigger. The feminist movement treats an entire gender as criminals waiting to happen, who must be ordered to not commit crimes, or expected to commit them.
Following that, thanks for addressing me as a man. (Have you ever considered that the problem with your dating strategy is you keep thinking that sex is something to be earned?) That's probably the most telling thing you did in your entire post. By not even bothering to read my sidebar, "Whose Blog Is This" to find out who you are dealing with, you let yourself fall into the oh-so-common feminist fallacy of assuming that the only people concerned with men's rights are men. In doing so, you have disclosed your sexist outlook.
Further, your whole argument relies upon treating your personal philosophy as being the reality in which dating takes place. It's not. It's not men who treat sex with women as a privilege, but sex with men as a given. It's women. It's even taught to daughters by their mothers and grandmothers, with inane adages like "why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free," meaning "don't be promiscuous, or no man will marry you."
Your belief in male consent agency is great, but it's not backed up by legal handling. The assumption that consent and body autonomy are reserved for women is an attitude which permeates modern western society, leading to such myths as the idea that men can't be raped, or if he is, he's weak or gay. Many western laws still define rape as something men do, and women suffer. When a man's sexual boundaries are violated, if there is prosecution, lesser terms like "sexual assault" and "sexual imposition" are applied. Try using "Woman convicted of forcible rape" as a search term. It doesn't call up any stories on the topic. Instead, it brings up stories on convicted men, discussions on male rapists of women, and a few hypothetical questions with hypothetical answers. Take out "woman" and you'll get even more stories about male rapists. Is this because no woman has ever forced herself on a man?
No.
Recent statistics in the U.S., from which I hail, show that women commit rape (forcing men to penetrate) as often as men (forced penetration.) However, when women do it, it's not legally considered rape - merely an "other sexual offense." When a man forces sex on a woman, it gets the most serious criminal labeling. When a woman forces sex on a man, it gets downplayed as a more minor offense. Does that show equal treatment and value of consent?
Your assessment of the paragraph beginning "In the dating arena" is another strawman, taking the discussion out of the sex act and into minor interactions, ignoring the context in which the statement is made. Again, I see two possibilities. Either your reading comprehension is low, or you're once again attempting to move the goalposts because you can't debate the topic. The claim that emotional response to sexual advances keeps women from saying no, made in the context of date-rape allegations and affirmative consent discussions, amounts to exactly what it says in that paragraph. This is reinforced by the idea that consent may be withdrawn at any time. If consent is withdrawn, but the change is not communicated, the man hasn't changed his intent. He is not responsible for the woman changing her mind. However, college disciplinary boards and criminal courts do hold men responsible for that change. Once again, your personal philosophy on how dating should be does not define how things are.
The same is true of your assessment of the one after, beginning "Complicating this environment." Your claim that no one is treating women as helpless is not backed up by criminal courts, nor is it backed up by feminist advocacy. Your next sentence attempts again to move the goalposts from discussion of incidents involving women who withhold communication and then accuse rape, to women who have been raped after saying no. The issue isn't that the circumstance described never happens. The issue is that you cannot address it without admitting that sometimes, rape allegations the woman believes to be true are false, and sometimes, a sexual encounter that a woman regrets experiencing is her own fault for choosing to not assert herself.
Following that, you add bigotry to your post, baselessly accusing MRAs as a group of having a love of "rapey behavior," which you fail to define. You've completely dropped all semblance of analysis and dropped into the realm of inarticulate denial and unmerited attacks.
Following that paragraph, you reply to the one beginning "This is taken to the extreme in the choice" with another attempt at moving the goalposts because you cannot debate the concept presented to you. With that, you level yet another straw man argument, attempting to debate an unmade statement of justification for sex with someone who is incapacitated. As previously stated, that is not a Men's Rights position.
Your answer to the next paragraph about the Gatekeeper to Consent argument is covered in my previous responses. The only thing I would add is that your reply is wandering and disconnected, and your dismissal is not a valid debate tactic.
Your response to the paragraph beginning "The answer is in how this combination may support the use of abuse" negates itself. I live in the western world - in the United States, where men are not considered able to be rape victims. Men do not have equal agency of consent here. Neither do they in Canada, or most of Europe. You can only believe otherwise if you ignore the entire first world's last few decades of legislative and legal history.
Your final paragraph is yet another straw man, choosing to argue against something much simpler and more benign than the topic discussed in the paragraph above it, the use of false allegations by women as a weapon. Attempting to retrain the reader's eye to the male rape discussion at that point is a sad stab at misdirection, considering it isn't even mentioned in the paragraph under which it is posted. You would do better to attempt to address the topic you brought up by placing that paragraph there.Your further choice to address the reply to MRAs as a group instead of the blogger at hand, leveling another ad-hominem attack on the movement instead of offering an actual point shows that your opinion is seated more in bias than knowledge.
Then again, maybe you would not. Your ability to stay on topic and handle tough questions with solid, well thought-out answers is seriously lacking. As you are a student, and as you write more like a person influenced than a person exercising reason, I suspect that you are still young, and have not had the chance to experience the level of discrimination and harassment some individuals in the movement you so hate have experienced. Perhaps after you have lived a little time outside the shelter of academia, you'll gain a better understanding of how things are in the real world. Until then, enjoy your delusions of practical equality while they last.
On feminist denial of biological differences between the sexes
This is one of the ways in which feminism handicaps everyone. In advocating the social and legal enforcement of the denial of human biology, feminist activism creates a stifling and oppressive environment for human interaction. We cannot treat each other as equal humans if we confuse equal with identical. As soon as we allow that misconception to be layered over our handling of interaction, we force ourselves to choose between conflicting responses. Do we accept the perception of unequal treatment, as real, existing differences conflict with ideology which denies them? Do we enforce unequal treatment as we try to use artificial means to make up for the differences we're expected to deny?
This, in turn, dramatically hampers the ability of the sexes to work together in team situations, by discouraging the recognition and use of strengths, and the recognition and transcendence of weaknesses... because we're not supposed to notice that most often, those strengths and weaknesses do run along gender lines. Feminist advocacy then further complicates the issue by compromising its own position in the most hypocritical fashion, refusing men the honesty of admitting that these differences exist when it would facilitate positive outcomes for men, but insisting upon highlighting those same differences when it would facilitate desired outcomes for women. Examples of the denial range from high impact hypocrisy such as the refusal to admit in the context of the work/pay discussion that overall, men are more heavy-labor capable, to lower impact obfuscation such as the "men never ask for directions" lament, which ignores the ability of men to utilize the more reliable tool available to them - a map. Examples of the highlighting range from the legally impacting claim of female inability to defend the self or escape in a domestic conflict, or the perceived inability of a woman to verbally communicate "no" when confronted with unwanted sexual advances, to subtle man-bashing jokes about lack of male empathy or the more observable state of men's reflexive responses, a socially accepted generalization.
By enforcing the false denial of an existing set of factors, and then manipulatively enforcing the exclusion of specific circumstances from that system of denial, feminist ideology impairs men's ability to relate to women. When physical differences affect interaction between opposite sexes, the man is put into a catch-22; he is not permitted to acknowledge or notice the difference, yet he is required to accommodate or defer to it. He may not treat the woman as less capable of performing heavy labor, yet he must make up for the heavy labor she does not perform. He may not treat the woman as more physically fragile, yet he is required to refrain from subjecting her to the level of physical testing to which he is accustomed. He is expected to display feminine empathy, while simultaneously crediting the woman with greater empathic intuition. He may not ascribe to her any level of caregiving capability, but he is not permitted to usurp her assumed right to claim superior caregiver status. How can one form a cooperative connection when the rule is that whatever one does is wrong? Where is the role to be filled, and how does one fit into it?
To women, the same attitude of systemic denial acts as a personal growth barrier.
In order to achieve personal growth, one must first be capable of discerning and assessing one's existing advantages and shortcomings. Self-improvement depends on the practice, honing, and benevolent exploitation of strengths, and attention to weaknesses with a focus on reducing or overcoming them. If one is expected by one's peers to ignore the influence of one's sex on those characteristics, it becomes rather difficult to address them. Do we admit to, and make use of, any stereotypically female virtues if in doing so we're betraying those who claim the right to pretend those virtues are not feminine? Do we admit to and strive to overcome stereotypically female faults if in doing so we're foisting that stereotype onto other women? By treating the acknowledgement that biological factors which affect human characteristics can fall along gender lines as a sexist attack on women, feminist advocacy robs women of the opportunity to be our better selves. We're asked to sacrifice our individual progress to feed the political power of the movement.
Of the many ways in which this unwritten order manifests itself, nothing is more damaging than the mandate of willful helplessness and the victim charge. The social advancement of the female sex should be dependent upon building a belief in our ability to overcome obstacles, our choice to embrace responsibility and own it, and our tendency to survive adversity and come back having sharpened ourselves for the next challenge.
Go ahead, life. Make my day.
Instead, feminist advocacy tells the general population to expect us to fail. It says that when faced with confrontation, we aren't tough enough to stand up for ourselves. When faced with academic challenges, we aren't smart enough to compete. When faced with competition, we aren't determined enough to win. When faced with a bad situation, we aren't independent enough to escape. When we get knocked down, we aren't resilient enough get back up and keep going. We must have reparations. We must have concessions. Feminist hypocrisy says that though men must treat us as successful achievers, we cannot attain that condition on our own.
This rides on the treatment of the concepts Greatness, Success and Achievement as having only male characteristics, and assigning negativity to characteristics traditionally considered female. A woman who does great things without acting like a man cannot be recognized for her accomplishments without compromising the feminist "alike" concept of nondiscrimination.
When physical differences affect interaction between opposite sexes, the woman is put into a catch-22; she is not permitted to acknowledge or notice the difference, yet she is often expected to use it as a crutch. How can one form a cooperative connection when the rule is that one must ignore one's nature? Where is the role to be filled, and how does one fit into it?
It is not male sexism which refuses to place equally high value upon a great caregiver and a great scientist. It is female sexism which does that, by insisting upon identical, rather than equal standards to those of men, emphasizing the nature of the job over the quality of the work. It is not male sexism which condemns female sexual freedom. It is female sexism which does that, by insisting on treating sexual gratification as a commodity, and women who don't keep it guarded as scabs in a perpetual strike. It is not male sexism which holds women inside dysfunctional and damaging relationships. It is female sexism which does that, by insisting upon assuming the position of victim for the purpose of exploiting the power of blame.
A woman's greatest disability is in feeling obligated to hold to the feminist standard of being dominated, and feminism's greatest dependence is on the laywoman never figuring that out. When we know that we don't have to lay down and cry for help instead of living our own lives... when we realize that the phantom oppression to which feminist leaders claim we're still subjected after over a hundred years of radical activism is not real... we are free to determine the courses of our own lives, define success for ourselves, and reject the controls imposed upon us by the only system of oppression we have left: Matriarchy.
This, in turn, dramatically hampers the ability of the sexes to work together in team situations, by discouraging the recognition and use of strengths, and the recognition and transcendence of weaknesses... because we're not supposed to notice that most often, those strengths and weaknesses do run along gender lines. Feminist advocacy then further complicates the issue by compromising its own position in the most hypocritical fashion, refusing men the honesty of admitting that these differences exist when it would facilitate positive outcomes for men, but insisting upon highlighting those same differences when it would facilitate desired outcomes for women. Examples of the denial range from high impact hypocrisy such as the refusal to admit in the context of the work/pay discussion that overall, men are more heavy-labor capable, to lower impact obfuscation such as the "men never ask for directions" lament, which ignores the ability of men to utilize the more reliable tool available to them - a map. Examples of the highlighting range from the legally impacting claim of female inability to defend the self or escape in a domestic conflict, or the perceived inability of a woman to verbally communicate "no" when confronted with unwanted sexual advances, to subtle man-bashing jokes about lack of male empathy or the more observable state of men's reflexive responses, a socially accepted generalization.
By enforcing the false denial of an existing set of factors, and then manipulatively enforcing the exclusion of specific circumstances from that system of denial, feminist ideology impairs men's ability to relate to women. When physical differences affect interaction between opposite sexes, the man is put into a catch-22; he is not permitted to acknowledge or notice the difference, yet he is required to accommodate or defer to it. He may not treat the woman as less capable of performing heavy labor, yet he must make up for the heavy labor she does not perform. He may not treat the woman as more physically fragile, yet he is required to refrain from subjecting her to the level of physical testing to which he is accustomed. He is expected to display feminine empathy, while simultaneously crediting the woman with greater empathic intuition. He may not ascribe to her any level of caregiving capability, but he is not permitted to usurp her assumed right to claim superior caregiver status. How can one form a cooperative connection when the rule is that whatever one does is wrong? Where is the role to be filled, and how does one fit into it?
To women, the same attitude of systemic denial acts as a personal growth barrier.
In order to achieve personal growth, one must first be capable of discerning and assessing one's existing advantages and shortcomings. Self-improvement depends on the practice, honing, and benevolent exploitation of strengths, and attention to weaknesses with a focus on reducing or overcoming them. If one is expected by one's peers to ignore the influence of one's sex on those characteristics, it becomes rather difficult to address them. Do we admit to, and make use of, any stereotypically female virtues if in doing so we're betraying those who claim the right to pretend those virtues are not feminine? Do we admit to and strive to overcome stereotypically female faults if in doing so we're foisting that stereotype onto other women? By treating the acknowledgement that biological factors which affect human characteristics can fall along gender lines as a sexist attack on women, feminist advocacy robs women of the opportunity to be our better selves. We're asked to sacrifice our individual progress to feed the political power of the movement.
Of the many ways in which this unwritten order manifests itself, nothing is more damaging than the mandate of willful helplessness and the victim charge. The social advancement of the female sex should be dependent upon building a belief in our ability to overcome obstacles, our choice to embrace responsibility and own it, and our tendency to survive adversity and come back having sharpened ourselves for the next challenge.
Go ahead, life. Make my day.
Instead, feminist advocacy tells the general population to expect us to fail. It says that when faced with confrontation, we aren't tough enough to stand up for ourselves. When faced with academic challenges, we aren't smart enough to compete. When faced with competition, we aren't determined enough to win. When faced with a bad situation, we aren't independent enough to escape. When we get knocked down, we aren't resilient enough get back up and keep going. We must have reparations. We must have concessions. Feminist hypocrisy says that though men must treat us as successful achievers, we cannot attain that condition on our own.
This rides on the treatment of the concepts Greatness, Success and Achievement as having only male characteristics, and assigning negativity to characteristics traditionally considered female. A woman who does great things without acting like a man cannot be recognized for her accomplishments without compromising the feminist "alike" concept of nondiscrimination.
When physical differences affect interaction between opposite sexes, the woman is put into a catch-22; she is not permitted to acknowledge or notice the difference, yet she is often expected to use it as a crutch. How can one form a cooperative connection when the rule is that one must ignore one's nature? Where is the role to be filled, and how does one fit into it?
It is not male sexism which refuses to place equally high value upon a great caregiver and a great scientist. It is female sexism which does that, by insisting upon identical, rather than equal standards to those of men, emphasizing the nature of the job over the quality of the work. It is not male sexism which condemns female sexual freedom. It is female sexism which does that, by insisting on treating sexual gratification as a commodity, and women who don't keep it guarded as scabs in a perpetual strike. It is not male sexism which holds women inside dysfunctional and damaging relationships. It is female sexism which does that, by insisting upon assuming the position of victim for the purpose of exploiting the power of blame.
A woman's greatest disability is in feeling obligated to hold to the feminist standard of being dominated, and feminism's greatest dependence is on the laywoman never figuring that out. When we know that we don't have to lay down and cry for help instead of living our own lives... when we realize that the phantom oppression to which feminist leaders claim we're still subjected after over a hundred years of radical activism is not real... we are free to determine the courses of our own lives, define success for ourselves, and reject the controls imposed upon us by the only system of oppression we have left: Matriarchy.
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